It has been a struggle...a deep struggle to do the things that are "normal or typical" at this time of the year at the cabin...
it often feels like my heart is so broken that I am not sure how it could ever be repaired again...and memories of my precious daddy are in everything...
thank you for all of your messages, your cards, your love, and your prayers (especially for sunday with father's day which was so incredibly hard)...
as I sat looking at this sunset last night I was gently reminded of the beauty that is being poured out in us despite feeling that we are surrounded by the dark in our loss...
from old friends sharing vulnerable and heartfelt messages to nurses/MAs that I am blessed to count as friends letting me breakdown in the clinic yesterday expressing deep fears and the trauma that has taken place- giving up their lunch time and I am sure messing up the ENTIRE flow of patients not by just a "few minutes" but making me feel like I was the most important thing that they could listen to... just so I could weep deeply...to friends donating money to help with treatment costs, to text messages that come at the EXACT right time...to so many people praying about my fear and the awful nightmares that have been finding me the last weeks...to a hundred other kindnesses...
Thank you for being a nightlight in the dark.
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