Caravan Sonnet: 12 Things to Pray for the Children of Parents with a Chronic Health Condition

10/30/14

12 Things to Pray for the Children of Parents with a Chronic Health Condition

I am so excited to continue this seven part series on Thursdays dealing with topics related to "What to Pray for Someone who is  Struggling with a Chronic Health Condition or who loves Someone struggling with a Chronic Health Condition"! In this series (when dealing with the word chronic) I am addressing anyone who has had an illness or pain for more than six months that has affected their life. 

This is a series that I have been praying about and asking the Lord to give great wisdom as I hope it will be helpful for someone! I am often told by very dear and well-meaning people, "I am praying for you" but am also told "I don't really know how to pray for you" or am asked just as often "How can I really pray for you?". While this series won't address every idea of what to pray and is not a "formula" I do hope and pray that it is a good "jumping off point" for you to be praying for those that you love who struggle with chronic health issues and their loved ones. 

If you are interested in seeing the complete list of the topics for the series you can find them by clicking on the links below:



** Thank you to  several "older children" who were in or are in this situation and who graciously shared their hearts, hurts, hopes, fears, and joys about this subject with me.**

1. Pray for their "new" role and wisdom to face new situations.  
Having a sick parent brings a "new" role into the relationship and often times an unwanted role at that. No matter the age, children of parents with chronic health conditions often have to take on an independent or adult type role in the relationship. This can bring with it a host of emotions including feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, scared, and a host of of other emotions. Having a parent who is struggling with a chronic health condition creates a change in the "normal relationship status quo" that often times the child is longing for. This delicate balance of how to help, how to support, and how to handle the shifting roles can be "tricky" to say the least. Pray for them as they navigate these trick waters.

"Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all of your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight."
-Proverbs 3: 5&6-

2. Pray for their communication skills with their parent. 
Along with number one above, pray that these children will have the grace and the knowledge of what to say and when to say it. It is not just the diagnosis that will be talked about but a million different details that include tests, doctors appointments, health jargon, etc. Sometimes it is hard to settle into these new "roles" that a health condition has brought to the table and there needs to be an incredible amount of patience, love, grace, and good communication on every one's part. Pray that these parents will be able to do this well.

"The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly."
-Proverbs 15:2-

3. Pray for those who are far away.  
Many times adult children do not live close to their ailing parent and this is an extremely difficult and emotional situation to handle. It is hard to be far away and not caring for your parent and not feeling like you are doing "enough". Pray for the hearts of those who live far away that they will be comforted and for wisdom on how to handle situations that arise while living far away.

"It is He who sits above the circle of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers; who stretches out the heavens like a curtain, and spreads them like a tent to dwell in."
-Isaiah 40:22-

4. Pray for those who are nearby (or who have taken in their ailing parents).  Just like there are unique situations for those who are far away there are unique situations to pray for those who live nearby (or who have taken in their ailing parents). These nearby caretakers are often at every doctors appointment or treatment and spend their days trying to balance their own family needs with their parents. It is an extremely difficult and sensitive area to handle and they need prayers for handling each of the situations they encounter.

"And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus."
-Philippians 4:19-

5.Pray against Fear
Is there anything that causes fear more than entrusting your a parent  to a team of medical doctors? I don’t think so. It is definitely a helpless feeling for all children and  fears abound...fears over a million details that could never all be listed. Pray against fear for these children. Pray that the Lord would take away all of their fears.

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you."
-Psalm 56:3-

6. Pray that they will know that God has not abandoned them. 
So many children that watch their parents struggle with chronic health issues struggle to believe that God is good and has not abandoned them. After watching so much pain and suffering it can be difficult to remember the truth. Pray that they will see God's mighty love and power despite their circumstances. 

"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. But even the hairs of your head are numbered. Fear not, therefore; you are of more value than sparrows."
-Matthew 10:29-31-

7.  Pray for their Hope. 
Dealing with the grief of a parent who is not well is heart-wrenching. Pray that they will not lose hope for themselves, their parents, or their situation. 

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you."
-Isaiah 43:2-

8. Pray for others to come around them and help them for the duration of this battle.  
These children (no matter the age) need people to come along side of them, walk the long road with them, and extravagantly love them in the midnight hours. The younger children need people who will step in and help by being at school events, helping them with homework, taking pictures for the sick parent, and the list goes on and on and on. Older children need friends to walk alongside physically but also emotionally. This could mean a million different things, but pray that they will have support and people that would walk this road with them. Illness is incredibly lonely but these children need that support at this critical time.

"...but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother."
-Proverbs 18:24-

9. Pray that they will believe the truth of Joel 2:25. 
"I will restore to you the years the locust have stolen..."
-Joel 2:25-

"My God turns my darkness into light."
-Psalm 18-

10. Pray for Healing, Peace and Acceptance. 
While we pray for healing for these parents, let us also pray that the children will also find healing, peace and acceptance in the day before them. Amy Carmichael, a missionary to India once said, "In Acceptance lies peace". This does not mean acceptance randomly that we pray for but for acceptance that the Lord has allowed this.

"He is the Lord, let him do what is good in His eyes."
-I Samuel 3:18-

11. Pray for patience, tenderness and compassion.  
"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves
with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience."
-Colossians 3:12-

12. Pray that no matter where your friend is (their bedroom because they are bed-ridden, a hospital, an ER, a doctors office, therapy, etc.) they will find Hope that the Lord is there. 
One of the most difficult things about a chronic health condition is that you never know what a day could bring. Pray that these children would find comfort and Hope that no matter where they are or what their surroundings are they can find rest in the Lord. Pray that these children will know that no matter the disease or ailment the Lord is in the midst of that and is Mighty.

"Lord, Thou has been our Dwelling Place through All Generations."
-Psalm 90:1-

"The Lord thy God is with you, the Mighty Warrior saves. He will take great delight in You; in His love He will rejoice over you with Singing."
-Zephaniah 3:17-

I hope these ideas have been helpful y'all! Sometimes when you are praying for someone with a chronic health condition you may feel that you are not "seeing" any results or doing anything, but the truth is you are!! God promises that He hears our prayers and He does hear yours! 

Keep praying for your friends and loved ones!! You are a blessing!!

9 comments:

  1. Such sweet prayers--Thanks for sharing this!

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    1. Thank you so much for stopping by and your sweet comment Chelsea!!
      :) Rebecca

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    1. Thank you so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment Ladonna. I appreciate your kind words!
      :) Rebecca
      p.s.- I wish that I could have replied directly to you but unfortunately you are a "no reply blogger" so I was unable to send you and email I look forward to hopefully connecting with you more in the future!

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  3. I know a parent with a very ill child. It is incredibly hard and she always asks that I pray for her child and her family. Thank you for the great prayer ideas.

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  4. So many things that would have never crossed my mind. As we all do, I hope to not be in this position anytime soon but it would be reassuring to know others were praying for us!

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    1. Jennifer, Thank you so much for your heartfelt comment. I know what you mean about not having many of these things cross my mind. So many times I have never considered the heartache and the difficulty of those who are suffering in so many different ways. I pray that that these suggestions of items to pray would be an encouragement for those who are in this situation. Thank you again for such a lovely heartfelt comment!!
      Rebecca :)
      p.s.- I would have loved to have sent you a direct email back but unfortunately you are a "no reply blogger" and I wasn't able to email you. Thank you again for your comment and I look forward to hopefully connecting with you more in the future! :)

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  5. I have enjoyed your writing. I personally have been dealing with chronic migraines and rebound head aches for 10 years. My kids are 22, 21 and 16. I worked all the time before I became ill. I didn't deal with it well in my opinion because I tried to pretend I was ok and hide all the pain I was in. I had my kids do "chores" to give myself some help without having to ask for it and appear weak or a failure. I have resently given my life back to God and have a new outlook and am researching how to live with chronic pain. I feel i am doing better with my teen son than I did with my girls and that can be credited to God. Anyway... To my complete suprise my daughter are expressing built up resentment, frustration, anger, feelings of neglect and so on. I never knew how I was dealing with my chronic pain was affecting my kids. This is all really new revelations here. So, could you share prayers for kids living with a parent of chronic pain. One they can pray for themselves or one I can pray for them. They are hurting and that breaks my heart. Guilt is another thing to pray for. I have so mich guilt over how my kids suffered. I don't feel I am asking for the correct prayers but I have explained in a nut shell and I have faith God will lead you to a good reply for this. Young adults who resent their parent for chronic pain maybe. My kids took on my mom rolls as chores. If they had known it was because i was in pain i think maybe we would not be in the pickle we are in today. Pray for healing of my girls heart and that they can forgive and let go of the past. Thank you for writing these. They are a blessing. God Bless.

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  6. I have enjoyed your writing. I personally have been dealing with chronic migraines and rebound head aches for 10 years. My kids are 22, 21 and 16. I worked all the time before I became ill. I didn't deal with it well in my opinion because I tried to pretend I was ok and hide all the pain I was in. I had my kids do "chores" to give myself some help without having to ask for it and appear weak or a failure. I have resently given my life back to God and have a new outlook and am researching how to live with chronic pain. I feel i am doing better with my teen son than I did with my girls and that can be credited to God. Anyway... To my complete suprise my daughter are expressing built up resentment, frustration, anger, feelings of neglect and so on. I never knew how I was dealing with my chronic pain was affecting my kids. This is all really new revelations here. So, could you share prayers for kids living with a parent of chronic pain. One they can pray for themselves or one I can pray for them. They are hurting and that breaks my heart. Guilt is another thing to pray for. I have so mich guilt over how my kids suffered. I don't feel I am asking for the correct prayers but I have explained in a nut shell and I have faith God will lead you to a good reply for this. Young adults who resent their parent for chronic pain maybe. My kids took on my mom rolls as chores. If they had known it was because i was in pain i think maybe we would not be in the pickle we are in today. Pray for healing of my girls heart and that they can forgive and let go of the past. Thank you for writing these. They are a blessing. God Bless.

    ReplyDelete