|Thoughts on “Remaining Soft”|
This specific place along the Seine, holds a very special memory for me.
When I was in college I had the incredible opportunity to briefly study abroad in France. I fell in love with it and made great friends. On one of my last nights in Paris they invited me to join them for a gathering along the Seine overlooking Norte Dame.
When I was in college I had the incredible opportunity to briefly study abroad in France. I fell in love with it and made great friends. On one of my last nights in Paris they invited me to join them for a gathering along the Seine overlooking Norte Dame.
It was the picnic that this romantic at heart found particularly lovely- a beautiful night, heartfelt conversations, laughter, and yes some dancing and of course some wine. Near the end of the evening, one of the guys asked the group what our hopes and dreams for the future were- specifically the next 20 years. We went around sharing deep things that somehow felt strangely comfortable with these friends of only a short time.
I remember being challenged because as we shared things held close to our hearts…Chloe simply said she wanted to “remain soft”.
She explained that as she watched women age over the decades so many of them turned “hard and bitter” if life didn’t go as planned or dreams were long in coming. The one thing she hoped was that in 20 years she could say she had fought hard to remain soft, being hopeful and joyful.
I was born into a legacy of women who have fought to remain “soft” despite the world being incredibly painful and harsh in a variety of circumstances. My grandmother “Ba” had only become more soft over the years before she died and I see this in my precious mom day after day. She clings to hope and joy in a viselike grip yet remains soft.
I don’t know what happened to Chloe and our other friends from that night, but I returned home and in my tiny college apartment I wrote on a plain piece of paper the words “remain soft”. That little framed piece of paper has lived in different locations and classrooms over the years, but more so in my heart.
I came into this trip with several personal things deep on my heart and standing there overlooking the Seine, 20 years later, I am gently reminded again of the hope “remaining soft”.
I remember being challenged because as we shared things held close to our hearts…Chloe simply said she wanted to “remain soft”.
She explained that as she watched women age over the decades so many of them turned “hard and bitter” if life didn’t go as planned or dreams were long in coming. The one thing she hoped was that in 20 years she could say she had fought hard to remain soft, being hopeful and joyful.
I was born into a legacy of women who have fought to remain “soft” despite the world being incredibly painful and harsh in a variety of circumstances. My grandmother “Ba” had only become more soft over the years before she died and I see this in my precious mom day after day. She clings to hope and joy in a viselike grip yet remains soft.
I don’t know what happened to Chloe and our other friends from that night, but I returned home and in my tiny college apartment I wrote on a plain piece of paper the words “remain soft”. That little framed piece of paper has lived in different locations and classrooms over the years, but more so in my heart.
I came into this trip with several personal things deep on my heart and standing there overlooking the Seine, 20 years later, I am gently reminded again of the hope “remaining soft”.
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